An Unexceptional Blog

I’ve often been told that I need to learn to not sweat the small stuff. Sweating the small stuff, I was vehemently assured, uses too much of my energy, stresses me out as well as everyone around me, and generally decreases one’s capability to enjoy life. “Don’t you know how to chill a bit and just have fun?” I’ve been asked. 

Consider, dear reader, my plea for sweating the small stuff. 

In case you don’t know this about me, I sweat all the small stuff. This becomes especially true around the holidays. I worry about all the small details, I agonize over getting things planned out, I think and re-think things through down to the “oh let’s not forget the blue mittens those are her favourite ones and she will be so sad if she doesn’t have them.” It’s me who will remember to bring an extra sound machine, just in case the kids end up in separate rooms where we are staying. I am the one who will get appropriately worried when nap schedules for babies aren’t respected, knowing full well that the babies are not the only ones that pay for this mistake later in the day. I am the one that meticulously chooses each word I speak during social gatherings, knowing that making the wrong choice will offend specific people even if it would make others laugh hysterically. 

In a way, sweating the small stuff is how I show that I care. Has everyone been offered a glass of water at this gathering? I don’t want anyone to feel forgotten. This baby is teething? Let me grab a freezing cold wet cloth for them to chew on. You are cold during the Christmas parade? I thought you might be; here is a travel mug of hot chocolate and a blanket which I’ve packed in my bag, just in case. I am the one that plans things out to perfection, predicting as many hiccups as possible, and planning for each of those as well, so that any outing might go well, and that the people I love feel cared for and have a great time.

Yes, sometimes it means that I am a nervous ball of anxiety. Sometimes I do take it too far and take on the feelings of too many people and plan for just too many possibilities. This also means that when I find myself in a situation where I didn’t sweat the small thing in question (the blue mittens, the extra sound machine, the nap schedule, the teething baby, the hot chocolate thermos), I am disproportionately disappointed in myself. I admit that all this takes a lot of my energy. As I said, I do sweat all the small stuff.

All I would like to argue, dear reader, is that someone needs to. The world needs people like me. Not everyone needs to sweat the small stuff, but, I believe that the world does need some of us to. 

Though the request no doubt comes from a place of concern, to those who would ask me to “chill,” you can kindly refrain from doing so. I am perfectly aware that I do not fit that descriptor. And, consider for a moment that I am not trying to. I am very much at peace with the role I am filling to balance out all the “chill” people of this world. I know who I am. And I am happily playing my part in this harmonious give-and-take of our civilization. Let the go-with-the-flow people be carefree, and let them innovate, and let them be brave and throw caution to the wind as they boldly step into unknown territories. And let the people like me, on the other hand, think of the intricacies of these adventures ahead of time, expertly plan for potential plot twists, bring an extra change of clothes for everyone, and keep in mind the hour at which everyone needs to be back and in bed. I believe, wholeheartedly, that both these kinds of people contribute to the success of any adventure. 

I deeply love all the go-with-the-flow adventurous people in my life (my husband included!), and I admire them: that is their super power. But, dear reader, I feel safe in the knowledge and certitude that the world needs my superpowers, too.